March 14th, 2013 | No Comments »

It’s Steak&BJ Day
Tonight…you need to take your man out…
get him a big, juicy, steak.
When he’s done…take him home and blow his mind. Literally and figuratively.

He deserves it.


Posted in Barbs, Uncategorized
March 10th, 2013 | No Comments »

[guest post by the Yearning Ninny]

Recently my life has come to resemble an episode of Jeremy Kyle;
and I have to say, it’s not done much to improve my view of men.
So here’s what’s happened…
A few months ago I met a guy,
a muscular, very good looking, single guy.
We started dating, we got on well;
I thought he was a nice guy.
He helped me get over my ex
and see that it’s possible to move on and find someone else.
Then the bombshells started to drop.
First of all he tells me he’s got 2 kids
(different mothers);
bit of a shock but not a deal breaker I thought.
Then he said he’s only just come out of a 12 year relationship;
again a bit of a shock, I put my guard back up.
Even though they were over,
inevitably there’s bound to be left over emotions after a relationship that long.
Then his ex called me.
Apparently she’s not his ex.
She’s pissed.
He spins the line to me that she’s lying,
will stop him seeing his kid
and it’s my fault because I told her the truth when she asked.
He wants me to tell her nothing’s happened between us.
I’m not much of a fan of this, but the last thing I want is to ruin a young girl’s relationship with her dad.
I figured I’ll say what he wants me to say to smooth things over for the sake of the child, then I’m off.
Then his not-so-ex ex contacts me again.
We chatted over messages for a good 3 hours or so.
She told me this guy had really changed since he’d come out of prison.
That little thing that he’d also not thought to mention.
She then talked about how he abused her,
physically and mentally;
and suddenly his manipulative response to being annoyed with me for telling her we’d slept together made sense.
This guy’s a textbook controller and manipulator.
I’ve no idea how he managed to keep track of all the lies and keep 2 women happy,
no wonder he was always tired.
Oh, and the funny thing?
Me and his ex swapped photos of the Christmas presents he got us;
They were identical. 
This guy.
Seeing up close a manipulator in action I can really see how these guys keep women in abusive relationships.
He straight away put the blame of the argument on me;
made me feel like it was all my fault, so that I felt I had to apologise to him.
He withheld all affection that night.
I felt like I was being punished.
When we did have sex again a couple of days later it was as if he was rewarding me with his affection.
It’s a powerful way to control someone.
If we’d been together longer and I was emotionally attached, rather than mainly just appreciating his muscles, this would have had a huge effect on me.
When I think back over our time together, there was a lot of good stuff,
when he was with me he made me feel special,
made me feel like he genuinely cared;
made me feel like I was lucky to be with him.
If I were to let those memories stay at the surface then my resolve would soon melt if he were to turn on the charm offensive in an attempt to win me back.
The thing that stops that from happening though is that picture of our identical Christmas presents.

That and the thought of telling my mum I’m with an ex-con.

[guest post by the Yearning Ninny]

Posted in Uncategorized